(no subject)

Let me clear up my enigmatic comment of earlier. Right now, I feel like the constant pressure of participating in game after game after game has made it so that I have not had a chance to connect with anyone in a non-game capacity for like a year and a half. If I can't find a way to integrate a social life in which I can make friends with the gaming that's being done then I am going to drop the gaming, because it is beginning to feel to me like an artificial social life.
When it comes down to it, I really just want to be able to have people over to my house to hang out and chat, I miss just hanging out with people as myself. It's not because I don't want to see gaming people, It's because I want to see the people, not the games.

(no subject)

The trick to all this is, I'm not quitting gaming right now. I never said I was. But I need to look into the problem, to see if there is a way to get people together without game as excuse. This is something that has been a bit lost in my life. Right now, my frustration comes from some issues I have with the nature of cliques in the EtM changeling community. In the past year, the Changeling game has exponentially increased in number of participants, but those participants have also begun forming into exclusive cliques that omit other people. I'm not in any of them. I'm an interloper wherever I try to go. That's how it feels to me. I'm not a townie, but I'm also not part of anything that the townies apparently formed in response to. I've been excluded from heroclix circles, for reasons unknown to me. I'm outside of a lot of the social networks of the people in the game and that is frustrating to me. I am sick of being an interloper.

And before people comment more about one aspect, this is not a romantic thing. I'm letting the universe handle that for a while. I'm going to just wait it out for a while. This is about brotherly love, not romantic love or even that crazy agape stuff.